They say that the two week wait to find out if you are pregnant is the hardest thing. You analyze every little twinge that you feel. For me it was cramping, nausea, and being tired. Sometimes the cramps were the bad thing for the day, other times wanting to throw up my chicken at lunch was the worst thing. If you recall me being nauseated is not a new thing and now I know that I shouldn't have read into anything.
This morning we went in for the blood draw to find out if we were pregnant. Of course since I have no patience I took a urine test this morning. Just more of the same that I'm used to seeing, "not pregnant." I knew that sometimes the urine tests are not that accurate especially this early, so I held out hope. When we got to the doctors to have our blood drawn the phlebotomist asked me if I had tested and I told her that I had and that it said not pregnant. She wasn't too optimistic that that the blood test would be positive and she was right. We just got a phone call that my blood pregnancy test was negative.
I felt like someone had just punched me in the stomach. The wind was knocked out of my sails. I'm pissed. I'm going to go back over every moment from the transfer on and analyze them to figure out what the hell happened. I have a pretty good idea of what I think happened, but that is not here nor there and doesn't change the fact that I'm still not going to be able to hold a precious baby in my arms.
So where do we go from here? As of today I stop taking the aspirin, estrogen, and the progesterone shots. I should get my period in 2-7 days. On day 3 of bleeding I will start the birth control again. We are going to try a frozen cycle this next time. At this point I am not sure what this entails, but we have an appointment June 3rd.
Monday, May 20, 2013
Saturday, May 11, 2013
Welcome To The Incubator!
Today was transfer day. We went into the office at 10:00 this morning. Prior to going to the office I had to drink 16 ounces of water so that they could use the ultrasound more efficiently. I also took a Valium that was supposed to calm me for the procedure. When we got to the office we had to wait for a while before we went back and the Valium pretty much wore off. Nick had a great time laughing at me though! We found out later that there were two retrievals before us this morning. Good Luck Ladies!
I thought that we were just going to go into one of the exam rooms like we did for the trial transfer. Oh no! We went back into the pre-op room. The embryologist came in a talked to us about our eggs. She showed us the pictures of the two that they were going to transfer back and explained why they chose those ones. The picture below shows the two they transferred.
The picture on the right is the best one. There is a little mass of cells on the lower left corner. That mass becomes the baby. The cells on the outer ring become the placenta. This one was the best because it was already starting to hatch; see the two little cells on the bottom? The picture on the left is a close second. It's not starting to hatch, but is close. She also showed us pictures of the other fertilized eggs that we had. One was at the stage that they were going to freeze today. There are three more they are hoping to freeze tomorrow. The rest of the 10 that were fertilized just didn't amount to much and weren't growing. Essentially we lost 4. We don't know if they weren't right genetically or there was something else causing them not to grow. Still pretty good odds if you ask me.
Then we signed a consent to have the two great ones transferred back. Then Nick and I had to change into a gown, hat, and booties again. This time Nick was able to be in the room with me. We walked into the same procedure room that we had the retrieval in and sat in the same chair. This time it was Dr. Mooney who did the transfer. Basically they put a speculum in and used the ultrasound to guide the catheter into the uterus to deposit the blastocysts in the right spot. Everything went well and I had absolutely no pain. After the procedure we went back into the room we changed in and changed back into our clothes and I was wheeled out to the waiting car.
Next step is basically a waiting game. I am on bed rest for the next three days. I am enjoying sitting on the couch and being waited on :) Oh who am I kidding, this is a common occurrence! I have a feeling that I will get bored really quickly though. I will continue with the daily progesterone shots. I want to give a shout out to the girls I work with who are getting stuck with shooting me up in the mornings when I have to work. You've all been doing a wonderful job! I am also still on the estrogen pills twice a day, along with prenatal vitamin, folic acid, and baby aspirin. At least there aren't 9 pills at night anymore! All will come to a head on May 20th. That morning I will go in for a blood pregnancy test and by that afternoon we will know if all of this worked. Until then, have a Happy Mother's Day! I love you mom!
I thought that we were just going to go into one of the exam rooms like we did for the trial transfer. Oh no! We went back into the pre-op room. The embryologist came in a talked to us about our eggs. She showed us the pictures of the two that they were going to transfer back and explained why they chose those ones. The picture below shows the two they transferred.
The picture on the right is the best one. There is a little mass of cells on the lower left corner. That mass becomes the baby. The cells on the outer ring become the placenta. This one was the best because it was already starting to hatch; see the two little cells on the bottom? The picture on the left is a close second. It's not starting to hatch, but is close. She also showed us pictures of the other fertilized eggs that we had. One was at the stage that they were going to freeze today. There are three more they are hoping to freeze tomorrow. The rest of the 10 that were fertilized just didn't amount to much and weren't growing. Essentially we lost 4. We don't know if they weren't right genetically or there was something else causing them not to grow. Still pretty good odds if you ask me.
Then we signed a consent to have the two great ones transferred back. Then Nick and I had to change into a gown, hat, and booties again. This time Nick was able to be in the room with me. We walked into the same procedure room that we had the retrieval in and sat in the same chair. This time it was Dr. Mooney who did the transfer. Basically they put a speculum in and used the ultrasound to guide the catheter into the uterus to deposit the blastocysts in the right spot. Everything went well and I had absolutely no pain. After the procedure we went back into the room we changed in and changed back into our clothes and I was wheeled out to the waiting car.
Next step is basically a waiting game. I am on bed rest for the next three days. I am enjoying sitting on the couch and being waited on :) Oh who am I kidding, this is a common occurrence! I have a feeling that I will get bored really quickly though. I will continue with the daily progesterone shots. I want to give a shout out to the girls I work with who are getting stuck with shooting me up in the mornings when I have to work. You've all been doing a wonderful job! I am also still on the estrogen pills twice a day, along with prenatal vitamin, folic acid, and baby aspirin. At least there aren't 9 pills at night anymore! All will come to a head on May 20th. That morning I will go in for a blood pregnancy test and by that afternoon we will know if all of this worked. Until then, have a Happy Mother's Day! I love you mom!
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